“Boscutti’s Rock’n’Roll Fables: Flying”

I don’t know about you, but I just don’t think Aesop’s fables cut it anymore.

I think it’s time we updated them with a television series of quick shorts that can teach important life lessons without resorting to talking animals.

Because I’m fond of a backbeat and tangled electric guitars, I’m leaning towards rock’n’roll fables.

You can read the first screenplay below. Hey, it’s even got shot numbers.

Fasten your seatbelt and share with your friends.

“BOSCUTTI’S ROCK’N’ROLL FABLES: FLYING”

Sounds of “Get Off Of My Cloud” by the Rolling Stones rolls into life.

01: TITLE: BOSCUTTI’S ROCK’N’ROLL FABLES

02: TITLE: FLYING

Sounds of 707 jet clipper stereo from exterior to interior.

INT. 707 JET CLIPPER

It’s some day in May in 1965 and we’re flying high above America in a commercial airliner.

03: Clouds fly by.

04: Pull back to reveal view through window pane. The window shade is down an inch or two.

05: Continue pull back to reveal a YOUNG PERSON’S face squashing up against the glass. With their hair over their face it’s impossible to tell whether it’s a young man or a young woman draped under a blanket.

06: Continue pull back to reveal MICK JAGGER fucking him or her from behind.

07: Continue pull back to reveal KEITH RICHARDS sitting next to Mick. A smoking cigarette dangles from his lips as he cleans his handgun.

08: Continue pull back to reveal CHARLIE WATTS sitting next to Keith. He’s reading a book titled ‘Military Campaigns of the Great American Civil War.’

09; Continue pull back over aisle. GROUPIES and OTHER FLOTSAM slouch in the seats behind the first row.

10: Continue pull back to reveal BILL WYMAN asleep in his seat.

11: Continue pull back to reveal Brian Jones’ seat is empty. Discarded blanket, squashed pillow, empty bottle of Blue Nun white wine. A discarded cigarette smokes in the aluminum ashtray tugged open from the armrest.

12: Suddenly the jet bounces. Passengers gasp.

13: And dips its left wing.

14: Then tilts steeply into the sky. A trolley loaded with meals scuttles back down the aisle, crashing off aluminum armrests. Passengers yelp.

15: Mick hitches up the blanket.

16: Keith cocks the trigger.

17: Charlie turns the page.

18: Jet levels. Passengers sigh.

19: Jet dips forward and the trolley crashes forward down the aisle.

20: Lavatory door just outside the cockpit door flies open as the CO-PILOT tumbles out trying to simultaneously tuck in his shirt, do up his trousers, straighten his cap and reach for the door to the cock pit.

21: Jet dips right.

22: Trolley crashes into the bathroom door, wedging in the co-pilot. More screams from the passengers.

23: Co-pilot struggles to open the bathroom door as jet soars into the sky.

24: Trolley dislodges and rolls aside.

25: Co-pilot squeezes out and lurches forwarded to open cockpit door.

26: Cockpit door flies open.

27: Fly in to see BRIAN JONES sitting astride the co-pilot’s seat, cackling like a maniac.

28: Broken amyl nitrate ampoules litter the control panel and instrument dials.

29: Brian moves to position an unbroken glass ampoule between thumb and forefinger of both hands under the PILOT’S nose.

30: Brian is reflected in the pilot’s aviator sunglasses as he snaps the glass popper loaded with amyl nitrate under the pilot’s nose.

31: Pilot recoils as the rush hits his heart and his brain and everything in between at the same time.

32: Every thought in the pilot’s body dilates as he yanks back on the joystick.

33: Jet rises up through the clouds.

34: Co-pilot grips the door frame with both hands. Trolley spills back down the aisle behind him.

35: Brian nods to his own song as he snaps two more poppers under the pilot’s nose.

36: Brian grins and chuckles as the jet banks high above the clouds. He’s on top of the world.

37: Co-pilot loses grip on door frame and spills down the aisle.

38: Brian looks into camera and laughs and laughs and laughs. Clouds slip by through the cockpit window behind him.

39: Push past Brian as clouds slip by through the cockpit window.

40: Clouds slip by.

Sounds of “Hey You Get Off Of My Cloud” echo and fade away.

41: TITLE: Moral: Never share drugs with commercial airline pilots